Word on the street is…

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#MommyChronicals, a way out of your head, divorce, emotions, EX problems, EX's, family, Feelings, funny, Ignorance, just quit, thoughts

Someone from here evidently knows my children’s father and knows me. Or, he’s being a creeper and stalking this blog site. Either way… I find it humerus.

Keep on trucking. 😄

}Beautifully Broken{

Xander Zone

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#MommyChronicals, a way out of your head, anger, depression, Feelings, Fog, insight, parenting, personal, random thoughts

***I am not at home when all this is happening.***

“Ladies and gentlemen: the story you are about to hear is true. Only the names have been changed to protect the innocent.”

It’s been a minute since I wrote here.

But my brain feels alone in this.

Well…..
I had an eventful day on Friday.

Our evening closed with us sitting at the Emergency Room waiting for Xanders transport to a behavioral health facility.

Xander is my son. Or maybe not anymore once he gets home and sets forth how much he dislikes me now. He also just turned 20 yrs old.

Little back story. He and my mother got him a new car. (2020) Between car note and insurance, it’s about $1000 a month. Lives at home with me and his GF is here too. He’s free to go and come, just let me know where you are going.

Now, he has been without a job for a couple months. Doesn’t seem to want to get one anytime soon. (Well, I guess I can’t say that. He tried his best to trick the drug urin screen they wanted him to do for an interview he had. But it didn’t work.)

My mother was on him about his car note and growing up. Getting off the pot and doing what was right. Somewhere among this talk he told her he had suicidal thoughts twice that Friday and was going to step in front of a car.
She told him to go ahead and do it. If he was going to kill himself he was either gonna do it now or later. No sense in waiting. He ran inside and grabbed a steak knife and attempted to cut himself.

Stopped, realized his sister was watching this, walked out the house, walked back in and hugged her and said goodbye. She called me and said I needed to come home because hell was breaking out.

I get home to find out my kid is gone and had plans to off himself. So I called the cops.
(He’s walking to the daycare where his girlfriend is working. But I already had her boss bring her home.)

Daycare locks down. (Can’t blame them with everything happening.)

The cop catches him and coming back from the daycare. Gets him to the ground and gives him a free back adjustment. Mr. Police Guy had assumed he still had the knife with him. (Can’t blame him.)

They bring him to the ER. After waiting for I don’t know how long. They transferred him about 10pm ish to the facility. So now we wait.

I did the typical mom thing and call the nurses station but can’t get anywhere because they need a code. I wasn’t given a code… Well shit balls…

Now, I’m sitting here in my own thoughts, feeling horrible for locking my son away. And no one to talk to about this.

I guess I’ll go to bed.

Beautifully Broken

The Boi goes to ‘The Forge’ tonight.

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#MommyChronicals, a way out of your head, army, depression, family, Fear, Feelings, insight, parenting, positive thinking, random thoughts, thoughts

💛🖤💛🖤Tonight, we light our candles.🖤💛🖤💛

Tonight, they March to ‘The Forge’!

It is 96 hours of sleep deprivation. Night time war simulation. I know they are in good hands with their training instructors. But still, a mom worries. It’s hard when you don’t hear from your kid.

They say do not stress. Go with No News is Good News and plan to come for Family Day/ Graduation UNLESS you hear otherwise

💛🖤💛🖤💛Army Strong💛🖤💛🖤💛

What is ‘The Forge’?

Week 2 of Blue Phase

(the 8th week of Basic Training)

The Forge is ONLY the final test of BCT, and happens in week 8 of basic training, each Trainee in the battalion must pass this part of the final test to be even be allowed to enter the world as an United States Soldier…it’s a grueling 81-96 hour course that begins with an approach of a 10 mile ruck march…and throughout the forge they can march 45+ more miles. The Trainee will leave Sunday night or in the wee hours of Monday morning, not had much sleep to prepare going into the forge! The Forge is a simulation of a nighttime invasion. Over the next 81-96 hours, the Trainee is tested on every part of their training that they have learned. It will be a test in teamwork, they will set up patrol bases, maneuver over/under/around obstacle courses, try to infiltrate other company’s patrol bases to get their flag, hand-to-hand combat, along with other things plus 50+ miles of marching…and all while being completely exhausted… the Trainee will have to work as one unit, yep teamwork makes the dream work, oh and they only thing they have to eat are the MRE’s. This final test is the Army’s way of preparing the Trainees for the possibility of future combat.

So, nothing much to worry about as a mom right?!? Ha!!! 🥺

🖤💜🖤💜~Beautifully Broken~💜🖤💜🖤

HORRRRRRRRRSESHIT!!!!!!!!!

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#MommyChronicals, a way out of your head, anger, Feelings, friendship, funny, humor, insight, Judgement, just quit, Louisiana, New Orleans, thoughts, throat punch

To the rotten motherfucker who saw the old guy hauling ass and heard me saying STOP THE BUS in my efforts to get him home in a timely manner then went back to her ONE HITTER….I sincerely hope your CHRISTMAS TREE explodes as you’re plugging it up and if you survive it… may your ol man or lady passes onto you the worse case of GONORRHEA this world has ever seen!!!!!!

Pffft “Good will towards thy fellow man” my ass…………HORRRRRRRRRSESHIT!!!!!!!!!!

LAWD!!!!

I have spoken… FUCK DISNEY!!!

~ Beautifully Broken ~

3 Sleeps and a Wake

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#MommyChronicals, a way out of your head, army, Christmas, family, Feelings, Holidays, Louisiana, military, Monday, parenting, personal, random thoughts, thoughts

(In this pic that are headed to Gas Chamber.)

My Sun is coming home for Holiday Block Leave.. I pick him up at 8am..

I’m so excited. I’m so proud of him. He’s my everything. This kid has endured a ton a BS throughout his life and has overcome it all.

~ Beautifully Broken ~

Army Mom

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#MommyChronicals, a way out of your head, army, Christmas, emotions, family, Feelings, Holidays, life, me, military, parenting, personal, random thoughts

A ton has happened in life lately. I have not posted to much on here and kind of been stagnant.

My Sun joined the Army.

He left for basic training in November. He’s the youngest and shortest in his platoon. He said in a letter they give him hell for it but he gives it right back.

(They are doing victory tower in this pic.)

He looks like a little toy soldier.

Lucky enough, we can view some pictures they take of them while they process through the different phases. Some of the faces he makes has me wondering what is going on in his brain.

I miss my guy so much. He’s been the man of the house since Bear passed away. That was allot for a young soul to burden. Wonder what life will bring forth to him.

~ Beautifully Broken ~

Privacy Or Is That Wrong?

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#MommyChronicals, a way out of your head, depression, different, emotions, Feelings, insight, life, me, personal, perspective, Principles, random thoughts, relationship, relationships, Self Doubt

My boyfriend found out this evening I have a private blog/journal..

I expressed, this place was a space for me to express my thoughts and feelings without being judged or worrying about hurting anyone’s feelings. That my councilor suggested I create one closing out my first marriage to help with processing my thoughts/depression.

He attempted to go to the site and and search for it. When I expressed that no one I know has access to it, he seemed to be annoyed. Then dropped the subject.

Am I doing wrong?

~ Beautifully Broken ~

It’s been 2 yrs.

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a way out of your head, friendship, life, love, positive thinking, random thoughts, relationships, romance, sex, thoughts

It’s been 2 yrs since I lost Bear to the accident.

I honestly thought my life would not be the same.

I still get sad. That is to be expected.

But I met a fellow. He’s super sweet and I hope Bear approves of him.

We’ve been talking for about 2 mths.

Dating After Death

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#MommyChronicals, a way out of your head, BDSM, death, different, emotions, Feelings, life

I met a guy..

I reconnected with a gentleman from High School.

I wonder what life will come of it.

He’s super tall, super funny, charming, handsome. He’s more vanilla then vanilla ice cream. So this will be interesting.

I wonder if Bear would approve. I’m doing my best to not compare the two.

I miss Bear still. I don’t know if that is wrong or not.

I’ll keep pushing forward.

~BeautifullyBroken~

Hate Crime 😡 Was In Full Blows.

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#MommyChronicals, a way out of your head, anger, Animals, Blood Lust, bored, boredom, dead, different, emotional abuse, emotions, Fear, Feelings, funny, hate crimes, insects, Judgement, just quit, Louisiana, Mardi Gras, me, random thoughts

SOMEONE PLEASE GIVE ME THE NUMBER TO WILDLIFE AND FISHERIES…
Wanna report animal cruelty and a possible hate crime.
Just saw 2 black ants beat the bejesus out of a red ant and drag his ass ALLLLLLLL THE FUX WAY FROM A GUM WRAPPER TO A PLASTIC BOTTLE…

CAN WE PLEASE CONTACT THE PROPER AUTHORITIES ABOUT THIS BEFORE SOCIETY CRUMBLES and a full blown race war happens because of this…

I’m really worried about it. Thanx.

😂